Procrastinate NOW, don't put it off...

Soooo. Anyone who tells you that procrastinating is detrimental,, they're wrong.. Procrastinating is how the world tells us that we are too fkn busy and to enjoy the moment... However, I cant seem to really enjoy the moment fully because along with being a procrastinator, I am also a chronic worrier. God damnit.
See I have a test in 3 hours, and another in the morning, and here I sit reading everyone else's blog, which in all truth, is really not something I do on an every day basis due to my disease, ADD... Also, I have taken this opportunity of "free time" to also, update my blog, thus being another example of things I don't do regularly unless there is something I seriously do NOT wanna do at the point that we could define as "critical" in relation to knowing the shit on my test... I guarantee half of my blogs that can be seen up here are in the midst of the last second cramming session, but hey what can I say? I'm more philosophical during these intervals i guess... So- all in all, something positive does come out of procrastinating.. Im contacting the school board now to take that stupid video against it out of the sixth grade curriculum... Come on present both sides....

On a lighter note...

So the weekend was a little "uncontainable". It consisted of jager bombs, near fist fights, and getting flashed by a bunch of girls in a limo. It is nearly the only place on earth i feel comfortable drinking at 10 am without looking over my shoulder to catch a judgmental glance.
Im sorry but Vegas is a trippy place. Can you imagine if 1500 years down the road, some scientist uncovered this long abandoned city. What would the scientific results be of our culture? Mentally retarded? A bunch of hotels with themes out in the middle of nowhere, dead in the middle of an endless desert?? weird, i'm sorry.
So i'm pretty sure me and my mom both got slipped a roofie by these creepy Brazilian guys. Reason for this being, has anyone who knows me seen my puke off two vodka and red bulls? I was absolutely fine till I got to the room, WTF!!? Damn foreigners. I have been drugged before and HELLO, exact same thing. I don't know why they waste their time and money buying me a roofie.. I'm the most stubborn drugged girl they'll ever meet believe me. Plus come on, don't they see the 4,752 mexicans slapping cards in your face to get you hooked up with someone real nice?? God save a few bucks and get a sure thing...GHB is spendy.. Ha ha oh man, I bet they wanted to die when they saw my 6'4" boyfriend come up behind me ten minutes later.
Anyway, after sustaining a harsh drugging, the next morning's drive home was fabulous. I bet my dad loved me flipping him off in the back seat the whole way home and screaming at him to quit driving like an idiot. I was a little low on seratonin apparently...

Love is Watching Someone Die

"And it came to me then,
that every plan,
is a tiny prayer to father time.

As I stared at my shoes,
In the ICU- that wreaked of piss and 409.

And i ration my breath, as I say to myself that I've already taken too much today.
As each descending peak, on the LCD took you a littler farther away from me..." DCFC

I can't keep from having those words crash into my brain over and over...God I hope my brother gets better, I cant deal with losing another person in my life.
Sorry if this was depressing, that's what it is.

((insert clever thought here))

1. I am a 21 year old girl who goes to the University of Utah, and I'm proud of it.
2. I speak spanish, but enjoy throwing in made-up words to make me sound better.
3. I love the smell of campfires, in the air-not on my clothes or in my hair.
4. I have been known to stop for green lights.
5. I'm probably the most distracted person you know... It's not you, it's me.
6. I believe small man syndrome is an epidemic.
7. I have two sides, a girly side who likes make-up, nails, and looking fabulous... Then another side who can shoot a gun and ride a dirt bike.
8. I have little tolerance for people who enjoy drama, and who insist on making me part of it...
9. I am a texting machine
10. I have a lot of friends, but only a couple that I am real close to... Its an exclusive club.
11. I randomly think of funny things to say throughout the day.
12. I don't listen to weird music, you do.
13. I only talk when I have something to say. This can easily be mistaken for shyness or being stuck-up.
14. My friends and family made me who I am today.
15. I buy anything with a star on it.
16. Black and red are my favorite colors.
17. If I was a Barbie, I'd be keg stand Barbie... Or I would be break-up Barbie- Who comes with all of Ken's accessories..
18. We're perfect for eachother
19. Yes- I am a career student. No- I don't like it.
20. There is a bud-light in the fridge calling to me... Ignore it Steph.
21. I am a firm believer in the "snow should only last between Thanksgiving and New Years" theory...
22. (insert clever thought here)
23. Twenty-Three is my favorite number... LOOOVE it for some reason.

The Walk of Shame

ALL NAMES AND REFERENCES HAVE BEEN CHANGED TO PROTECT THOSE... RESPONSIBLE hahahhaha (JK!)
So.. I'm not perfect. I make dumb choices, decisions, and sometimes create situations in which I only further complicate my life...PHEW, thats out of the way.. With that preface, this is probably my biggest stupid ass moment.. Being young and dumb isn't always what it's chalked up to be... September of '06, I'm 19, and at this point, really didn't have much concern for boyfriends or the relationships pertaining to boyfriends.. Why all the sudden did that change!!??? WHY?!?!
So... I meet a guy, we'll just call him "dumb fucker" or DF for short. DF and I meet while I'm on a boating trip with my friend and her entire family. I was feeling a little out of place, or shy because I only knew one of them and in all truth, there really wasn't room for me on their boat full of kids, so I stayed behind on the beach with my friend's husband who was sleeping in the trailer. A couple hours after sneakily CHUGGING 5 or 6 of the "Purple Passion" drinks, I was beginning to run out of "solo beach activities", given that I was low on oil and the weekend had only just begun. Plus it was hot... I was about ready to retreat to the trailer when a boat came around the bend. I had known DF was going to be there, just not at our camp. They beached the boat and came up on shore. DF walked in the trailer where "the husband" was awake. We hadn't really exchanged words yet, I was sitting on a chair outside the trailer door looking the other way. I heard them talking, then my friend's hubby walked out the door and sat by me.. It was about five minutes before DF emerged. Do you know the saying "don't judge a book by it's cover"? Well I was really trying. How about the saying "you can tell a lot about a person by the first words they say"? Well DF emerged from the trailer somewhat fanning his ass. The words that came out of his mouth were "geeeezzz-USS!!! don't go in there WHHEEEEEEW". I smiled, but secretly was embarrassed at myself for some reason. I was forced to laugh a little, but my sympathy laughter came to an abrupt halt when I saw the concern on my friends husbands face-who apparently had caught the fact that the fan wasn't going...
I left the camp with them, the boat looked nice at this point, and the Half Gallon of Jager looked even better... We had a really good time actually. Nice crowd, fun people, and surprise- I was drunk. The next day I walked the 15 minute walk down the beach to my friend's camp.. I was innocent, but everyone looked at me with a smirk on their face... The whole way back i couldnt quit thinking "walk of shame" and later patented the saying. This walk will be forever the original "walk of shame"
I ended up staying mostly over at DF's camp, and at the end of the weekend, we exchanged numbers and that was that.. A year and a half later my mistake ended. Actually it had been over for much longer than that.
Not all was bad, but I'm glad it happened... and I'm glad it ended... for me--

*&@#&%

Have you ever wanted to just explode and tell what only you know!!?? Where every time you are around someone you just wanna grab a megaphone and yell it at them from inches in front of their face?

Where is the fun in huge secrets? I don't understand the logic at times.